Loving Completely — How to Show Up More Fully in Your Relationships


#21

gnosisman + If the idea of finding a woman or women who just want(s) to have sex sounds even the least bit appealing…why not? If there is common decency/respect between the two of you and you both are being real about what it is, I don’t personally feel there’s anything wrong with meeting those needs. I realize it’s hard to imagine that you might get more out of such a relationship than sex…but you never know… especially if you can find some kind of acceptance that this woman (women) are not necessarily “stupid” but, rather, just operating from a different place… (you wouldn’t want to be thinking & telegraphing an attitude of “you’re too stupid for anything but sex”…or at least, I don’t recommend it! You could be scaring women off before you’ve ever had a chance to get to know them…) Maybe meeting just the need for physical intimacy will bring you into a more open/positive head space… where, possibly, instead of focusing on how “it ain’t gonna happen” (finding the “perfect” partner), you might feel more “o.k.” about that (?)…and possibly more willing to get your other needs met in other, non-physically-intimate relationships? I’m only suggesting this as one possibility, not knowing what your comfort level might be with it. Not sure if you mentioned previously, other than you’d ultimately want more than that. I know I always feel better when I go about moving toward whatever it is I most need…even if it’s only a part of the whole picture. For example, if I can find time for physical activity out in nature, I feel “fed” by it, and just a little step such as that can help remind us that our well-being is in our own hands…help us feel less powerless…and of course all of these little internal “wins” tend to add up…and help lift us out of a victim mindset (so easy to fall into if we’re not careful!), allowing us to more easily see interesting possibilities or new/creative ideas on which direction we would “like” to head next…and to find the motivation to take some action in that direction.


#22

Heidi, Thanks! I didn’t know about that option! Maybe I will at some point. :slight_smile: I do find that even just sitting here reading/watching/listening to people of like mind, both here and elsewhere online is surprisingly nourishing in some way… just knowing that others are, in fact, “out there” who share similar ideas/thoughts/interests… I’m very busy just managing my life in general (family, work, home, etc) and it’s sort of a “life saver” that I can combine my “down time” with this type of “connection”. As limited as it may seem, it’s actually kind of huge :):relaxed: