I have a good enough understanding of enlightenment and spirituality to hazard a guess at what happened, but I wanted to post here and discuss it because I’ve never had this kind of experience before.
The past 6 days I’ve increased my daily meditation to an hour after beginning, “The Three Pillars of Zen,” by Philip Kapleau. This marks a period of taking spiritual practice far more seriously and so I’ve taken the beginners mindset. I’m reading one chapter each week, and doing the meditations based on what that chapter advises. So for this week I’ve been counting each inhale and exhale to 10, then starting over.
Today I felt especially unfocused and had monkey mind like crazy, but powered through, bringing my attention back to the breath whenever I realized I had gone off. I started feeling my face tingle and thought I might be breathing oddly and making myself oxygen high or something, so I started taking longer inhales and exhales.
Throughout this I just started feeling really, really good, bordering on euphoric. This built up and up until I burst into tears and laughter with my face buried in my hands. I felt this immense swelling of love and gratitude for myself and my life. I had a troubled childhood and I kept thinking, “I’m going to be okay. Life is so good and I’m so grateful for who I’ve become.”
My alarm went off maybe 5 minutes later and I immediately text my friends and family to tell them how much I loved and appreciated them. It was almost like a compulsion to share these emotions.
So was this an awakening of sorts? Or did I just get myself high on oxygen?
Thanks for the help